Monthly Archives: August 2010

>When Relatives Aren’t Relavant

>What’s Playing on the iPod right now: “The One” – Mary J Blige
What I am reading now: “An Inconvenient Friend – Rhonda McKnight

My aunt passed this weekend.  Dad’s sister.  And though I feel sympathy for my cousins that will miss their mother and my father that can no longer call his sister, the lost is not a personal one for me.  Should I feel bad that I don’t feel bad?

When we were young, my sister and I spent a lot of time at our aunt’s house.  She kept us while our parents worked.  Dad was stationed out of town and mom worked the 3-11 shift.  I have memories of playing with my second cousins, walking to the neighborhood convenience store and praying that it didn’t storm.  My aunt was old school.  Whenever a thunderstorm came through, appliances were unplugged, lights were turned off and everyone had to lay down.  Even if it was 2 o’clock in the afternoon and you weren’t close to being sleepy.  I remember the home cooked meals and not being allowed to sit on the plastic covered living room furniture. 

But once I reached the age of 12-13, we were allowed to stay at home.  Visits to my aunt’s house became less and less.  As an adult, the relationship was reduced to speaking at the random family function.  Two polite strangers related by blood.  Neither one of us taking the time to build a relationship.  So, although I mourn the lost of her life, it’s hard to miss the relationship that we didn’t have.

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